Today’s real estate agents are not just choosing a brokerage, broker-owner Lori Muller writes. They’re choosing a collaborative community where they can thrive.
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In every organization — real estate or otherwise — there comes a defining leadership choice. It’s not about production numbers, titles or even experience. It’s a mindset choice:
Does your brokerage have a ‘me’ leader or a ‘we’ leader?
That single distinction determines culture, retention, growth and, ultimately, legacy.
The ‘me’ leader mindset
A “me” leader builds an organization around themselves.
They may be highly driven, charismatic and even successful by traditional standards. But their leadership is rooted in control, ego and self-preservation. Decisions are filtered through a single question: “How does this benefit me?”
“Me” leaders often:
- Measure success by personal income, status or recognition
- Need to be the smartest or most powerful person in the room
- Control information, decisions and opportunities
- Take credit for wins and deflect responsibility for losses
- Lead through authority, pressure or fear of replacement
In a me-led environment, people perform — but they rarely thrive. Team members feel like assets instead of partners. Innovation slows because ideas must be approved, controlled or filtered through the leader’s ego.
Over time, trust erodes, disengagement rises, and turnover becomes normalized. The organization may grow fast — but it rarely grows strong.
The ‘we’ leader mindset
A “we” leader builds an organization around people and purpose.
They understand that leadership isn’t about being indispensable — it’s about building something bigger than themselves. “We” leaders ask a different question: “How does this serve the team, the mission, and the long-term vision?”
“We” leaders:
- Share credit freely and take responsibility fully
- Hire people smarter than themselves and empower them
- Create transparency instead of information silos
- Lead by example, consistency and service
- Invest in development, mentorship and leadership pipelines
In a we-led organization, people feel seen, valued and trusted. Ownership replaces compliance. Collaboration replaces competition. Accountability becomes shared — not enforced.
The result? Sustainable growth, stronger community and leaders who stay — not because they have to, but because they want to.
Why this matters in real estate
Real estate has no shortage of “me” leadership models. For years, the industry has celebrated rainmakers, top producers and personalities who built brands around themselves. While production matters, leadership matters more.
Today’s agents are not just choosing a brokerage; they’re choosing a collaborative community.
They want:
- Transparency instead of promises
- Partnership instead of hierarchy
- Growth paths instead of glass ceilings
- Leadership that develops them, not uses them
“We” leaders understand this shift.
- They don’t fear strong people — they build them.
- They don’t hoard opportunity — they create it.
- They don’t lead from the spotlight — they build stages for others.
The real difference: Control vs. contribution
At its core, the difference between “me” and “we” leadership comes down to control versus contribution.
- “Me” leaders control outcomes. “We” leaders contribute to outcomes.
- “Me” leaders build followers. “We” leaders build leaders.
- “Me” leaders create dependence. “We” leaders create capability.
And here’s the truth many leaders avoid: A “me” leader’s success often ends with them. A “we” leader’s impact multiplies beyond them.
Legacy is the real metric
Leadership isn’t proven by how many people work for the broker. It’s proven by how many people grow because of the broker.
The most successful organizations aren’t led by heroes. They’re led by builders — leaders who understand that shared success is stronger than individual dominance.
A “we” leader doesn’t need to be the center of the story. They’re focused on building a story worth continuing.
Every leader gets to choose—daily, consistently, intentionally—how they show up.
You can build a business around you, or you can build a business that thrives without needing you.
One type of leader creates control. The other creates legacy.
And legacy will always outlast ego.
All this month, we’re focused on The New Brokerage Playbook. Running a brokerage in 2026 looks nothing like it used to. From major players to scrappy indies, we’ll map the new playing field and talk with brokerage leaders across the country about what’s working now — and what’s next.
Lori Muller is the president of Fathom Realty in Appleton, Wisconsin. Connect with her on Facebook or LinkedIn.
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